Justin Bieber Dildos And Other Celebrity-Endorsed Products You Need In Your Life
Shia LaBeouf: Paper bags
Shia could release a full collection of paper bags featuring various other slogans that people could buy. 'Recycling is good' or 'I am a victim of commercialism', maybe. Just some suggestions.
Kim Kardashian: Bum pads
We probably don't need to explain why this would be the perfect product release for Kim K...
Miley Cyrus: Tongue-themed... stuff
We can't think of anything more appropriate than a collection of tongue themed items that Miley can slap her name on. Tongue shaped cutlery maybe? A tongue patterned clothes line? There are tongues of ideas she could go for. (Sorry).
Taylor Swift: Bird seed
OK, this idea is entirely based on Taylor's surname but we think it's brilliant nonetheless. Having a celebrity endorse bird seed means the public's awareness of birds is raised (probably) and birds that would otherwise go hungry or have to survive on bland food, get to enjoy yummy Taylor Swift-themed treats.
Zooey Deschanel: Clip-in bangs
Quirky Zooey is best known for her heavy fringe and with clip-in man buns so hot right now, we can't think of better timing for Zooey to release her own collection of funky fringes.
Zayn Malik: Temporary tatts
We love Zayn, but he's one of many celebrities who seem to have forgotten that tattoos are permanent. Just think, YOU could be sporting an exact replica of his chest wings, or a charming copy of his devil skull in a top hat smoking a cigarette. Guys and girls, get in line!
Justin Bieber: Dildos
That grainy image of a naked Bieber is embedded into the mind of every JB lover, and what better way to take advantage of that, Justin, than by releasing a line of dildos based on your...ahem...'member'? Thank us later, ladies.
Jennifer Lawrence: Anti-slip shoe pads
Poor Jennifer. Three times, and for variously odd reasons, she's fallen over in public. But what a perfect opportunity to laugh it off by releasing a line of anti-slip pads so that her fans never have to experience a similar fate.
Donald Trump: Inspirational posters
With profound, significant quotes such as: "The worst thing a man can do is go bald. Never let yourself go bald" and: "You know, it really doesn't matter what the media write as long as you've got a young and beautiful piece of ass," we can't think of a better way for Donald to share his enlightened knowledge than by releasing his own inspirational posters, that'll perfectly adorn bedrooms and offices around the world.
Ariana Grande: Doughnuts
News outlets got a little overexcited a few months back when Ariana Grande bizarrely licked a tray of doughnuts that sat exposed in a California bakery. So what better way to capitalize on the event than by releasing her own brand of doughnuts. Pre-licked for your pleasure.
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Could this BE any geekier?
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Oh. My. GOD.