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What Do The Stars Hold For You In 2017?

Jennifer Lynn
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Friday, December 23, 2016 - 14:30

Need some hope that 2017 is going to be a better year than 2016? Then look no further than your horoscope, which obviously tells you everything you need to know in life, with 100% accuracy. 

Maybe.

Your Definitive 2017 Horoscope

  • Aquarius (January 20th – February 18th): It’s going to be a big year for you, Aquarius, as you make like your sign buddy Harry Styles and try out a new project or two. If going solo worked for fellow Aquarian Justin Timberlake, you two will nail it.
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  • Pisces (February 19th – March 20th): It’s your year to shine bright like fellow Piscean, Rihanna, especially in your luuurve life. 2016 was way too much about work, work, work, work, work, but 2017 will allow you time to focus on matters of the heart.
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  • Aries (March 21st – April 19th): Like Emma Watson, you’re always shouldering a lot of responsibility, Aries – but that’s the way you like it. Expect new challenges at work that you’re going to completely ace, obviously.
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  • Taurus (April 20th – May 20th): Yaaaaaaas Qween! You had such a hectic 2016, whereas 2017 is going to be a lot more chilled, and there might just be some exciting family news towards the end of the year to look forward to.
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  • Gemini (May 21st – June 20th): You’ve been flying under the radar for a while, Gemini, like the Olsen twins. This year you’re taking centre stage. Enjoy it, just don’t forget to make time for you in amongst all the madness.
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  • Cancer (June 21st – July 22nd): 2016 was a year of transformation for you, which Khloe Kardashian certainly knows a thing or two about. Now 2017 is all about balance, whether that be work play or friends and relationships.
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  • Leo (July 23rd – August 22nd): Much like Gemini (and Barack Obama), 2016 was your most important year yet, so 2017 is going to seem like an easy ride by comparison. Take up a new hobby and make the most of it!
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  • Virgo (August 23rd – September 22nd): You and Beyoncé are going to have big decisions to make in 2017, Virgo, when it comes to both work and your home life. Don’t ask for too many opinions: you know your own mind.
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  • Libra (September 23rd – October 22nd): For you and Kim Kardashian, 2017 is all about reinvention, Libra. Become the person you’ve always wanted to be and, if you’re already there, keep doing you honey.
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  • Scorpio (October 23rd – November 21st): Like Drake, 2016 might have been an interesting year for your love life, but in 2017 you’ll begin to feel a lot more settled with the object of your affections. Just don’t come on too strong!
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  • Sagittarius (November 22nd – December 21st): You’ve been working away quietly in 2016, like Taylor Swift, but in 2017 a project will come to fruition and you’ll reap the rewards. Be patient.
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  • Capricorn (December 22nd – January 19th): You’re the strong, silent type like Zayn Malik, but in 2017 you’ll deepen some close bonds that could lead to long-term friendships and relationships. Isn’t that nice?!
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LIKED THAT? READ THIS: 15 New Year’s Resolutions Inspired By 2016

15 New Year’s Resolutions Inspired By 2016

  • I will take politics more seriously and fully research all candidates before voting. Two words: Donald Trump.
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  • I will not take my musical heroes for granted and will see them live whenever possible. RIP Prince and David Bowie.
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  • I will be careful not to reveal too much information on social media, because even though I’m fabulous, some other people in the world are not. Kim K, we miss you.
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  • I will never stop believing in myself, like Leonardo DiCaprio, who finally took home an Oscar in 2016.
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  • I will be more careful not to endanger animals. RIP, Harambe.
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  • I will continue to binge-watch only the finest original programming. Roll on Stranger Things season two.
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  • I will let my hair down and go clubbing more often, if only to prevent the closure of more iconic institutions like Fabric.
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  • I will not air my dirty laundry in public, or through the medium of song, like Beyoncé. No matter how great the songs are.
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  • I will be kind and do what I can to help my fellow humans. #Aleppo
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  • I will work hard, but not too hard. (Get well soon, Kanye.)
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  • I will take up a new sport. Anything the 2016 Olympians and Paralympians can do I can do better. Obviously.
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  • I will take care of my sexual health, like Prince Harry and Rihanna, who took HIV tests together on World AIDS Day.
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  • I will incorporate boxing or self-defence into my workouts and kick prankster ass, just like Gigi Hadid.
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  • I will rise above the haters, like Amy Schumer. Fuck those trolls.
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  • I will stand up for love, like Prince Harry.
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