28 Chat-Up Lines That Have Literally Never Worked
Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you.
Are your legs tired? Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.
Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.
Was your dad a boxer? Cause you're a knockout!
Are you my appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my tummy that makes me think I should take you out.
Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet arse.
Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling.
Hi, I’m Mr Right. Someone said you were looking for me?
You know where that dress would look great? My bedroom floor.
If you were words on a page, you'd be what they call fine print.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.
If you were a tropical fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.
You make me wish I was cross eyed, so I could see two of you.
Do I know you? You look a lot like my next girlfriend.
You've got something on your bum – my eyes.
Are your parents artists? Because you're a masterpiece.
Do you work for the Post Office? I could have sworn I saw you checking out my package.
I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U?
I think you dropped something… My jaw.
Shall I call you in the morning or just roll over and nudge you?
You're so pretty, your bone structure is giving my bone structure
Do you sleep on your stomach? No? Can I?
Are you here to meet a nice guy, or will I do?
I've lost my teddy bear. Can I sleep with you instead?
Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven?
What's a nice girl like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
If I was a fly, I'd land on you, because you're the shit.
Rick And Morty Star In Run The Jewels' Latest Hip Hop Video
This Sh!t is LIT!
The Winner Of RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars 3 Is Revealed: Condragulations!
SO many spoilers in this article...
Instagram Account Turns Call Me By Your Name Into Monet Artwork
Yeah, they named it 'Call Me By Monet'.
RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars 3 Finale Is TONIGHT, But Who Deserves To Win?
Tonight at 2am on Comedy Central!
Cartoon Impractical Jokers Is Here And It's Everything We Dreamed Of
It's all we ever wanted.
Rick And Morty Just Played The Main Stage At A Festival, WT Actual F
Life doesn't get better than this.
The Internet Shares All The Wonderful, Nice Things It Absolutely HATES
Dogs in costumes, guys. STOP IT.
Beyonce Fans Admit Depraved Things They'd Do For Concert Tickets And OK, WOW
Is everything okay at home, guys?
Teen Co-Star Tells Adorable Stories Of Will Smith On The Fresh Prince Set
"He was still a human being through the process of everything."
Matt LeBlanc Is Not Keen On A Reboot Called 'Old Friends'
"Personally? I don't think so."
RIP Stephen Hawking, Here Are Some Of His Funniest Moments
He will be missed.
People Are Claiming They Can Hear Janice Through This Photo
OH. MY. GOD.
This Dog Has A Human Face And The Internet Is Losing It
Is that a dog or a human?
The 2017 Funny Women Awards Results Are In
It's what they deserve!
The SNL Cast Impersonated The Oscar Nominees And It’s HILARIOUS
They were spot on.
Taylor Swift Has Us Screaming 'MOOD' In The 'Delicate' Music Video
Honestly, Taylor is us 24/7.
The Internet Shares Ken Dodd's All-Time Funniest Jokes
Fans & comedians pay their respects to the comedy legend, who has died aged 90.
7 Times You Missed Friends Foreshadowing Its Celeb Guest Stars
Tweets That Prove Macaulay Culkin's The Funniest Person On The Internet
First up, he's called @IncredibleCulk.
Macaulay Culkin Debunks Theory That Home Alone's Kevin Grew Up To Be Jigsaw
He called out that weird Elvis story AND all his fake deaths.