We Asked A Chef How They'd Cook Your Favourite Pokémon
You know that thing where you see a cute baby on the street and you think to yourself "man, I really wish I could just eat its cheeks, like with a delicious piri piri dip just gobble it all up"? Course you do, because apparently wanting to eat cute things is a legit psychological reaction to cute overload.
So, obviously, Pokémon are the cutest, definitely-screaming-to-be-eaten animals in the world, and what with this whole Pokémon Go thing sending everyone into a frenzy, we decided to ask a professional chef (Cabana's Lizzy Barber) just how she would prepare a few of our faves for a tasty, childhood-destroying feast!
> Watch: The Blended Junk Food Taste Test
Take it away, Lizzy.
As the most famous Pokémon, Pikachu has to be served as our best-selling dish – a Spicy Malagueta Pikachu Skewer! Like all unidentified meats, we can assume he’ll “taste like chicken”…
I’d marinate him overnight in our sticky sweet Spicy Malagueta sauce, then grill him whole over our custom-made grill.
To serve, I’d pair him with some Sweet Potato Fries and a classic Caipirinha cocktail. This is Pikachu, Brasil style.
I reckon this Pokémon would have a bit of a natural kick, so I’d cut out his ribs and use him for Spicy Malagueta Charmanderibs – I’m sure his fire would complement the marinade perfectly.
After all that spice, I’d serve him with a refreshing Brasilian beer like a Sagres or a Palma Louca. He’d be a great one to enjoy whilst watching the football.
Hmm, his shell tells me Squirtle would taste quite mild and seafood-y, like prawns or lobster, so I’d cook him up in a Squirtle Bahian Coconut Curry.
> Watch: JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD
This is a mild, creamy coconut curry from Bahia, Brasil’s sunshine state. For extra presentation points, I may just use the shell as a serving bowl ;-)
He’s got to be served with a Cabana Colada - - a cocktail of fresh pineapple blended with coconut cream, coconut water and citrus, with coconut rum liqueur. Totally tropical!
I think he’d taste very vibrant and green, like fresh green peas, so I’d cut off his plant bulb and use it for a Bulbasaur version of our Hipanema Salad!
His healthy plant taste will go perfectly with the nutrient rich quinoa, avocado and squash of the salad.
To drink, I’d have to pair his energising qualities with our Super-suco Smoothie, made with açai, the Amazonian super berry. You could fight many a battle after this meal!
This cutie looks like it would go perfectly in a sweet treat, so I’d blend him up, turn him to ice cream and serve him as a Brasilian Overload Jigglypuff Sundae.
> Watch: Stephen Colbert Talks Comfort Food With Jamie Oliver
I’m sure his puffiness would make it extra creamy! He’d be topped with plenty of “Brigadeiro” chocolate truffles and lashings of doce de leite caramel sauce.
And to drink with him? A super sweet Red Tail Parrot cocktail, with cachaça, strawberry and passionfruit purees.
This aqueous creature is the perfect shape to cut into rings, coat in a light salt & pepper flour and deep fry for crunchy Crispy “Lula” Dratini rings. I’d squeeze some lime over him, and serve him alongside some Malagueta Mayo for dipping.
I’d drink him with a light, crisp wine, like a Sauvignon Blanc, or if I was feeling particularly pleased about catching him I’d celebrate with a flute of Miolo Cuvee Brut – our favourite Brasilian sparkling wine.
Farfetch’d seems like another “tastes like chicken” creature, so I’d take his wings and turn them into a bucket of Spicy Malagueta Farfetch’d Wings. To add insult to injury, I’d finely chop his leek stalk or spring onion, and use it as a garnish.
These would be super tasty served alongside an invigorating Watermelon Caiprinha.
This big beast looks he’d have a big ol’ rump on him, so I suspect I’d be able to get a cut of meat out of him similar to the ultimate Brasilian cut of beef, “Picanha”, or “cap of rump”.
> Watch: Dominos Pizza Is The Most Depressing Food In The World
It would be super moist and flavourful, so I’d grind it up into a burger patty and create a Likitung “Picanha” Burger, with Malagueta Mayo, Chimichurri, tomato, Rio beans and matchsticks.
For an added treat, I’d slow cook his tongue, marinate it in Spicy Malagueta Sauce and serve “pulled Lickitung tongue” as an optional extra. This rich and meaty burger would go perfectly with a full bodied South American wine, like an Argentinian Malbec or a Chilean Cabernet Sauvignon.
So there you have it, 8 incredible recipes guaranteed to make your favourite Pokémon go down a treat. Wonder if Pokéfood's available on Just Eat?
Find out more about Cabana Brasil here, and their incredible chef, Lizzy Barber, co-author of 'The Cabana Cookbook' and 'Carnival!’, here.
Related: People Are Sharing Their Scarily Similar Pokémon Twins
People Are Sharing Their Scarily Similar Pokémon Twins
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