This Dark Theory About Ross Geller Will Make Friends Fans Truly Livid
We love Ross. Really, we do. But there's been considerable evidence to say he's The Worst Person In The World throughout the ten series of Friends.
Remember when he forgot Emily's name at his wedding? Remember how he treated Mona? Remember when he convinced Rachel to give up her dream job in order to be with him? He was a douchebag at the best of times - but it was the dino geek and his science jokers that always made us laugh the hardest.
One Friends fan, David Hopkins, thinks it runs deeper than that. In a misanthropic essay for Medium, (and a very Ross-like tone, might we point out), the writer suggests Ross is the "tragic hero" of the series, picked on by five stupid friends, living in a country that rejects smart people and their progressive ideas. Sound a bit strong? Listen to this soundbite:
"I want to discuss a popular TV show my wife and I have been binge-watching. It's the story of a family man, a man of science, a genius who fell in with the wrong crowd. He slowly descends into madness and desperation, lead by his own egotism.
With one mishap after another, he becomes a monster. I'm talking, of course, about Friends and its tragic hero, Ross Geller."
Hopkins goes on: "You might think I’m crazy. But to quote Ross: “Oh, am I? Am I? Am I out of my mind? Am I losing my senses?”
You may see it as a comedy, but I cannot laugh with you. To me, Friends signals a harsh embrace of anti-intellectualism in America, where a gifted and intelligent man is persecuted by his idiot compatriots."
Hopkins clearly hasn't watched Joey teach Ross how to flirt. Or when Chandler sticks by him, despite the fact he held a CREEPY AS HELL memorial service for himself after Chandler joked he was dead on a college reunion website. Or when Phoebe sweetly thanked him for the best gift anyone had ever given her, when Ross adorably bought her a bicycle. Or when Rachel kept a box of keepsakes from every date they ever went on.
If that wasn't enough, Hopkins actually thinks (and hold onto your Hugsys) that "Friends may have triggered the downfall of western civilization". Someone is Westminster-crabby.
The writer reckons even the THEME SONG is depressing. Um, dude, that's kinda the point.
He thinks The Rembrandts tune is saying "life is inherently deceptive, career pursuits are laughable, poverty is right around the corner, and oh yeah, your love life's D.O.A. But you will always have the company of idiots. They will be there for you."
Anyone else thinking that sounds pretty much spot on? If he wants a world where our idiot friends aren't there for us (and everyone actually thinks Ross' Spudnik costume is witty) , then frankly, we don't want to live in it. Long live Friends (and Ross, we suppose).
Related: If The Friends Characters Had A Burn Book
The Friends Burn Book
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