According to the Metro (the paper, not the French transport system) the majority of the positions are hospitality and catering jobs and could earn you £95 a day. How'd you like them apples? Which is what you might be saying to customers...if you're serving apples, that is.
To be honest, this news doesn't exactly inspire much confidence in the quality of culinary snacks that will be on sale at the Olympic stadium, does it? To go from watching the Olympic torch on EastEnders to serving grub at the Games in three days isn't quite the Michelin star training regime favoured by the likes of Gordon Ramsay, is it?
Even more worrying is that 18% of the jobs available are in building and construction which kinda begs the question: what exactly have they forgotten to build? They've had five years for crying out loud, let's hope they've remembered to build a stadium for the opening ceremony or we'll have to hold it outside Buckingham Palace, like the Jubilee concert, and that'll really annoy Philip.
As for the other jobs on offer, we like to think they've followed Willy Wonka's lead and some of them are actually golden tickets to compete in the games. That's why we're going to apply for every single one of the 1000 jobs on offer, just in case. It'll be worth it to see the look on my smug neighbour's face when she sees me lining up next to Usain Bolt in the Mens' 100m final.
Copyright : Comedy Central UK