When we say 'leaked' we don't mean La Gaga spilt her Yardley Eau De Auntie all in her bag and stuff. We mean some tricky blighter leaked pictures of her perfume on the internet, causing a great big fuss.

The perfume is called Fame, don'cha know? And it comes in a mysterious black liquid.

"It's black like the soul of fame but invisible once airborne," says the marketing guff. God, we love marketing guff.

Lady G had previously announced that it would contain blood and semen and would appeal to 'expensive hookers'. We can only imagine what the marketeers would have made of that.

"Created by the dying raptures of a billion spermatozoa, waving goodbye to existence with notes from a forest of spontaneous nose bleeds."

Now The Daily Slap is not the kind of publication to boast a detailed knowledge of prostitutes, expensive or otherwise, but we would wager that the last thing a high-class hooker would smell of is blood and semen. We reckon they'd smell really, really nice and have good manners.

So it's just as well the marketing department came up with: "tears of belladonna, crushed heart of tiger orchidea with a black veil of incense, pulverized apricot and the combinative essences of saffron and honey drops."

So, not blood and the mess of a man, then? Fine.

Copyright : Comedy Central UK