Sometimes science scares us, like when Jeff Goldblum turned into a fly. Sometimes it amazes us, like when Doc Brown took Marty to a place that didn't need roads. And sometimes science just makes us thirsty. That's how we felt today when we read that scientists have used their powers of hocus pocus to create a genetically modified cow that can produce hypoallergenic milk. We don't have any allergies - well, apart from one ex-girlfriend...maybe two - what made us thirsty with excitement was the potential this breakthrough suggests. One day, we could have cows that produce chocolate milk.

The team of scientists from AgResearch in New Zealand have come up with a way of removing the horrible bits from cows milk that gives babies allergies. So instead of getting sickness, stomach cramps and nappies from hell, they only get the goodness they need to grow big and strong and one day come up with ideas like how to create cows milk that doesn't give you allergies. Ah, the circle of life. Anyway, this amazing story made us daydream about the wonderful Wonka-esque possibilities.

If you can isolate and remove certain elements from the milk, can you also add ingredients? If so, we'd like to put in an order for a steady supply of chocolate milk, Fabian from accounts would like strawberry and Quentin, our resident poltergeist, is rather partial to butterscotch. Any time next week would be great. Thanks.

And what about breast milk? It's already universally acknowledged that breasts are one of the greatest inventions since TV that you can pause, but imagine if they produced flavoured milk. They'd be enormous fun to unwrap, tasty and contain a treat - like a human Kinder Surprise. No? Maybe we're on our own with that one then.

Of course, we're not really suggesting animal - or human - milk should be tampered with for our nourishment. This is merely a piece of silly fun intended for everyone aged 8 to 80. By the way, apparently there are two cows for every person in New Zealand. You get given them at passport control.

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