26 Signs That Your Parents Are Massive Technophobes
1 Turning something 'on' is a Herculean task.
Mainly because they furiously keep pressing the A/C button.
2 They continually find new ways to plug cables in incorrectly.
3 They use ‘download’ as the verb for anything vaguely tech related.
“I’m going to download the photo to the email and then download that to my grandson and then download it to the printer. Download.”
4 They don’t touch their computer for weeks on end whenever it displays a simple error.
Or call you up in an state of panic, having cordoned it off with same caution reserved for unexploded bombs.
5 Their speed of their typing makes time feel like it’s going in reverse.
Each keystroke requires a thorough scan of the entire QWERTY set-up.
6 They manage to send every important document to the recycling bin.
And then delete the recycling bin.
7 Or assume that something has 'disappeared' because they've closed the window.
8 And especially don't understand the concept of closing tabs.
9 They reply to an email by starting a new email.
‘RE’, ‘reply’ and ‘reply all’ mean nothing to these people.
10 You get to relieve the best memes of ten years ago whenever you see they’ve forwarded something to you.
“You have just GOT to see this Chocolate Rain guy!”
11 They respond to every Nigerian Prince who gets in touch.
“Such a nice man, this Nigel Saladu. He trusts me and is offering $4 million dollars if I help him in his hour of need.
12 Or they’re convinced every website on the internet is out to steal their bank account details.
They only feel safe browsing with tinfoil wrapped around their head, mouse and debit card.
13 They shout through every Skype conversation.
Because they can’t fathom the witchcraft involved in video calling and still think they’re essentially yelling to you from across the country.
14 They refuse to take their mobile anywhere.
In case it runs out of battery.
15 They send everything too early.
16 They regularly ask you to pass the “doofer” or “zapper.”
17 They still think it’s possible for computers to come without ‘the internet.’
“Ooh, did your new laptop come with an internet, Marjory? Fancy!”
18 They are very confused by web initialisms.
Lots Of Love! Bring Round Brian! Well That’s Fantastic! Pre-Menstrual Syndrome Lol!
19 And how they could possibly contact someone in a different room.
20 They would print out the entire internet if they could.
So they can keep those YouTube videos forever.
21 Their Google search terms are ludicrously specific.
22. When they’re not confusing it with Facebook.
23 Search histories terrify them.
24 They also steadfastly refuse to use Google to solve tech-related problems.
Because leafing through the 900-page tome of a manual with instructions primarily in Korean is far quicker.
25 They insist on scouring through all the Terms and Conditions before clicking accept.
Less they end up the middle part of a Human Centipede.
26 They say "Don't blame me, I don't grow up with this stuff" at any point, ever.
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