29 Catastrophic Rap Lyric Fails
1 Lil Wayne - Blunt Blowin'
There's mind-bending wordplay, and then there are puns that'd make a cracker-joke-writer wince.
2 2 Chainz - Fork
“I'd also like to give props to my pancreas, my garden furniture and my last-but-one poo, for reals, yo.”
3 Group Home - Sacrifice
Sooo... not like a rattlesnake, then?
4 Gang Starr - Beyond Comprehension
How well? Real well. Like a gazelle.
5 Notorious BIG - Who Shot Ya?
Biggie outs P. Diddy as the kinda guy who daintily quaffs at sickly, Christmassy liquers, like a nan.
6 NWA - Findum, Fuckum and Flee
NWA's Eazy E is saying that he's lost his third ejaculation (of six). Where did you last have it, Eazy? Have you tried retracing your steps?
7 NWA - Dopeman
Eazy E again, boasting that he's made so much money from selling drugs, he can afford to dress in corduroy – truly, the fabric of kings.
8 A$AP Rocky on Danny Brown - Kush Coma
See what you've done there is A) rhyme 'phonebook' with 'phonebook', and B) misunderstand what a phonebook is.
9 Trinidad Jame$ on A$AP Ferg - Work (Remix)
Stammering like a chess-club geek struggling to stand up to a bigger kid = not a great look in hip-hop.
10 Redman on EPMD - Head Banger
Oof. Come on, dude. Jesus.
11 J Cole - Dollar and a Dream III
12 Mac Miller on Ariana Grande - The Way
Mac Miller owns two DVDs, girl. Take yo pick.
13 Canibus - Second Round Knockout
Thaaat... might not have come out exactly how it sounded it your head.
14 Luniz - I Got Five On It
And the same goes here. Pffft. Fnerr.
15 Common and Canibus - Making A Name For Ourselves
You pair are crap² at maths
16 Wiz Khalifa - Let It Go
In a literal manner; word for word; exactly
17 Ludacris - My Chick Bad
We're with ya. Balloons!
18 Papoose - Live freestyle performance on Shade 45
“...unless of course it's from M&S, who are usually quite helpful regarding that kind of thing, y'feel me?”
19 Run DMC - King Of Rock
Ahhh, the Fab Three – George, John-Paul and Ringo.
20 Jay-Z - It's Hot
This is how that long-running Jay-Z vs. Galileo beef came about...
21 MOP - Half and Half
...and this is why MOP and Sir Isaac Newton started feuding.
22 Papoose - Top Of My Game
Proof that almost-clever is actually far dumber than not-at-all-clever.
23 Jim Jones - This Is Gangsta
Easy mistake. We've all been there!
24 Juelz Santana - Black Republicans
Of all the birds in all the world, y'had to go and pick a flightless one.
25 Warren G - What's Next
If you ever get the chance to play Scrabble with Warren G for money, seize it.
26 Trinidad James - You A Problem
Likewise Trinidad James, who heroically managed to misspell his own name on record.
27 Young Jeezy - I Do This Shit
He's talking about a diamond, see. Not Corn Flakes. Because Lucky Charms, right, that's also a kind of cereal. But he doesn't mean them either. Does your head hurt a bit now?
28 Young Buck - Bang Bang
Good question! We're gonna go with... probs not.
29 Pitbull - I Know You Want Me
It's Alfred. You massive, massive bozo.
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