Two and a Half Men - Season 9 | Ashton Kutcher

Valued at $1.3 billion, you’d think Walden Schmidt (Ashton Kutcher) would be the happiest man alive. Wrong. In fact this Internet billionaire wants to kill himself and that’s how we’re first introduced to Two and a Half Men’s newest leading man.

After being dumped by his wife Bridget for being too emotionally immature, Walden, maturely, tries to commit suicide in the ocean – but it’s too cold.

It’s fate, and the sudden need for a warm drink and a tumble dryer that brings Walden together with the Harper family who, as it happens, have room in their family for a new ladies man.

Walden has the tendency to walk around butt naked, but when you’re hung like an elephant (Alan’s words not ours) you would wouldn’t you?! Oh and he’s a hugger. Everyone loves a hugger.