The Definitive Ranking Of Kenny McCormick's Deaths
No one's suffered more at the hands of South Park masochists Trey Parker and Matt Stone than poor Kenny McCormick (well, except Britney Spears. And Kanye. And Mel Gibson. But, moving on) and we thought it important to honour the poor lad in death as well as life.
From getting full-on impaled by a boomerang to falling on a pile of rusty nails, Kenny's never had it easy - but goddamn, is his misfortune funny to watch. Check out our favourite deaths, ever:
13. When Kenny Got Cooked In A Microwave (Season 1, Episode 5)
Stan knocks Kenny flying, directly into a conveniently-open microwave. Ping!
12. When Kenny Died At The Touch Of Death (Season 1, Episode 6)
A bout of explosive diarrhoea put an end to him there (and a personal visit from Death himself).
11. When Kenny Got Crushed By A Pine Tree (Season 2, Episode 3)
10. When Kenny's Head Was Sliced By A Boomerang (Season 5, Episode 7)
Like a knife through butter.
9. When Kenny Got Massacred With A Chainsaw (Season 1, Episode 7)
Kyle's chainsaw takedown of Zombie Kenny is bloody, gory perfection. Hey, it had to be done to save the townspeople (and so he could come back as a zombie and we could see him die again).
8. When Stan and Kyle Combined Forces (Season 1, Episode 1)
His body gets whacked by Stan and he gets his head pulled off by Kyle. His body is then eaten by rats, after which, Kyle says "rats." Clever.
7. When Kenny Contracted Syphillis After Getting A Blowjob From Tammy Warner (Season 13, Episode 1)
Pretty self-explanatory, this one.
6. When Kenny Got His Head Ripped Off By American Football Players (Season 1, Episode 4)
This one was painful. Arms ripped off by two Middle Park Cowboy players, before a third tackled him and slcied his head clean off. Yikes.
5. When Kenny Got Impaled On A Flag Pole (Season 1, Episode 2)
We'll never forget that slooooooooow slide.
4. When Kenny Got Struck By Lightning (Season 3, Episode 1)
Thank god Kelly was there to revive him!
3. When Kenny Accidentally Got Shot In The Head (Season 11, Episode 14)
Almost nothing beats the random gunshot from Wendy and Bebet at the dinner table. Except...
2. When Kenny Died Of Chicken Pox (Season 2, Episode 9)
All the boys wind up in hospital, teh parents get herpes - but it's Kenny that shuffles off this mortal coil.
1. When Kenny Fell On A Pile Of Rusty Nails (Season 3, Episode 4)
Just so brutal. RIP, mate.
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