The Funniest 2018 New Year's Resolutions On Twitter
It's nearly that time of year lads...
Time to make those God awful New Year's Resolutions.
We ALL know we'll break them within the first month. You're not really going to get to the gym five times a week, cut out chocolate for good, or be a nice person 24/7... but it's the thought that counts, right?
Don't worry. A LOT of people are already starting on them.
Here's the most relatable New Year's resolutions:
1. When will we ever stop procrastinating? NEVER!
my new year’s resolution has been to stop procrastinating for like the past 6 years lol
— tiller (@brysontiller) December 2, 2017
2. Honestly, why are we so weird when we're drunk?
My 2018 New Years resolution is to stop being such a big fuckin freak with a drink in me ✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️✌️
— Anna Clark (@annaclarkx) December 10, 2017
3. Sorry, what was that? We weren't paying attention.
My New Years Resolution is to regain my attention span.
— Cameron Hurley (@cameronhurley) December 11, 2017
Ethan: My new years resolution is to stop.
Amy: Stop what?
Ethan: Not sure yet.
— Incorrect Teamiplier (@not_teamiplier) December 6, 2017
5. Living in 3017.
my new years resolution is to continue being a dumb bitch bc at least i know i can accomplish that
— paul rudd (@philsadelphia) December 8, 2017
6. The pain. WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR LIFE WE CLICKED ON YOU BY ACCIDENT!
my new years resolution is to not accidentally click your live video
— chad jamian (@chadjamian) December 11, 2017
7. Continue not exercising? SO DOWN.
My New Years resolution was to be a fat piece of shit, but I already nailed that so now I have to think up something else.
— Blue Moon (@Bluestmoon_) December 6, 2017
8. You don't need to watch people playing with putty for five hours. Promise.
My New Years resolution is to stop checking my explore feed on instagram
— shed rager (@shrdnhgr) December 8, 2017
9. Ah. Sleep the days away. A perfect way to spend time.
my new years resolution is to take more naps
— bills (@baytuckkks) December 11, 2017
10. It is deffo getting done. 100%. Deffo.
my New Years resolution is to eventually update iOS so I️ don’t have the I️ glitch I️ I️ I️
— Albert (@AlbertsStuff) December 9, 2017
11. One day you will look them in the face and say NO.
My New Years resolution is to stand up to hairdressers.
— RIOTGAL (@SophiaTassew) December 9, 2017
My New Years resolution for the last 4 years has been to eat better and work out, but instead I follow fitness models on Instagram and pretend like pickles are a vegetable
— MOM JEANS (@klxurxE) December 5, 2017
13. Now that you could do... maybe.
You, an optimist: "My new years resolution is to be fit, finish college, and save a bunch"
Me, a realist: https://t.co/yHCwvyYcyo
— Zac Czuhai (@ZacCzuhai) December 11, 2017
14. DON'T ASK US HOW THEY'RE GOING.
Me when y’all ask me about my New Years resolution that i’m already breaking on January 3, 2018... pic.twitter.com/yvLcn68HB3
— #isucktittiesforfun (@_iLoveDRE) December 8, 2017
am I allowed to give up on this country for my new years resolution
— cole weidman (@coleweidman) December 11, 2017
16. BUT IT'S HARD.
New Years Resolution:
Stop spending so much freaking money
— kenze stephenson (@makenzesteph) December 6, 2017
17. Ah. Your hamartia.
New Years resolution: stop falling in love with literally every cute boy I see
— glam girl lily (@lily_bbeatrice) December 7, 2017
18. We relate.
Already decided on a new years resolution which is to just Give Up.
Very motivated, starting early
— liv (@OliviaisAwkward) December 6, 2017
19. MOOD MOOD MOOD.
It was my New Years resolution to lose 15 pounds.
Still have 35 to go.
— Nick (@nick_peterson4) December 6, 2017
20. Just a little less. We can do that. Surely...
My New Years resolution is to be a little less of a piece of shit
— Jerry Medina (@J_Medina11) December 5, 2017
You know what? We give up already. Maybe next year.
The Ultimate Christmas Stocking Filler Guide 2017
The Ultimate Christmas Stocking Filler Guide 2017
1 of 26
2 of 26
3 of 26
4 of 26
5 of 26
6 of 26
7 of 26
8 of 26
9 of 26
10 of 26
11 of 26
12 of 26
13 of 26
14 of 26
15 of 26
16 of 26
17 of 26
18 of 26
19 of 26
20 of 26
21 of 26
22 of 26
23 of 26
24 of 26
25 of 26
26 of 26
Scrubs Merch Only TRUE Fans Will Understand
Rick & Morty Just Gave Us Lesbian Summer And We're Obsessed With Her Already
We really wish C-137 Beth was allergic to red wine.
People Are Debating Over The Best Friends Character And The Winner Will Surprise You
Get three divorces and the world will love you.
Lisa Kudrow Says Phoebe Was A Twin To Cover 'Mad About You' Role
The shows aired back to back, and that was a BIG problem!
Oh. My. God! Friends Pub Quizzes Are Coming To Cardiff & Bristol
What is Rachel's favourite movie? No, her actual favourite movie.
What Is RuPaul's All Stars And Why Are We Gagging For Season 3?
Shantay, you stay right there. It's about to get good.
Impractical Jokers: First Episode VS Last Episode
Sal, Q, Murr and Joe: Before and after.
Hear The Adorable Story Behind Iconic Friends Episode 'The One With All The Poker'
23 years ago and we're still crying.
People Watching Friends For The First Time Are Noticing Some VERY Weird Things
Literally everyone hates Ross.
Friends Blooper Revealed: There Are TWO Phoebes In The First Ever Episode
How did we miss this HUGE mistake?
50 Of The Most Shocking Moments EVER On Impractical Jokers
Piercings, planes, pole dancing and poor presenting.
How Old Were The Friends Cast In The First And Last Episodes?
40 year-old Courteney Cox is even hotter than 30 year-old Courteney Cox, fact.
Zach Braff Says A Scrubs MOVIE Might Be On The Way
"I think that would be something we could all do. I mean, I would."
STOP EVERYTHING: Friends Has Been Voted The Greatest Sitcom Of All Time
What's YOUR favourite Friends moment?
Rick And Morty Was Trending On PornHub And Oh, Jeeeeez
Turns out 'Dick And Morty' was pretty popular...
Someone Faceswapped The Friends Cast And It's Freaky And Upsetting
Ross Buffay should never see the light of day again.
20 Impractical Jokers Reaction Faces We Can't Stop Laughing At
From fart-throwing to dinosaur foreplay.
RuPaul's Drag Race Star Courtney Act Is Opening Up On CBB And We're Loving It
We're rooting for them all the way!
Golden Globes Stars of 1998 Looking Even Hotter In 2018
Jennifer Aniston's doin' it for the Friends cast.
RuPaul Star Courtney Act Styles Out HUGE Wardrobe Malfunction Outside Big Brother House
If you've got it, flaunt it.