You're one of those people always going on about getting an office dog, aren't you.
Trying to convince your boss that no, it wouldn't shit everywhere, yes, you would remember to walk it and OF COURSE it wouldn't be a distraction, Angela, get back to your desk, you stupid bint.
Need some backup? Check out these hardworking hounds.
Show 'em to your boss. Look how much they're getting done. How loyal to the company they remain. Thinking about it, they're definitely getting a promotion before you do. Perhaps keep these to yourself...