Cookie Monster Has A British Cousin Who's All About Biscuits

Biscuits! Ha ha ha ha!

The Cookie Monster is one of the all-time greats. You get exactly what you were looking for: a monster who loves biscuits. Really, more of us should strive for his level of focus and drive.

There is just one problem, though. British kids don't eat cookies, they eat biscuits. So what's a little Brit to do? The world can't just allow them to fall into a pit of alienation and despair.

It's a good thing CBeebies was on the case, because they've totally nailed the solution. Just give Cookie Monster a cousin, let's say a British cousin, who loves biscuits just as much as Cookie Monster loves cookies. It's perfection.

And yes, of course you call him Biscuit Monster. There's no need to get fancy here. Biscuit Monster loves biscuits. Like, fucking loves biscuits.

And that's how the world should be.

NAM NAM NAM NAM NAM.

WHAT AWAITS THE COOKIE MONSTER IN BRITAIN? HERE'S AN AMERICAN'S GUIDE TO LIVING IN THE UK: