Pokémon Noob Gives Characters The Hilarious Names They Deserve

Bulbasaur? That's Onion Turtle. Diglet? Floor S***.

For every 500 people who're completley obsessed with Pokémon Go, there's one weirdo who couldn't give two Diglets. 

Take this guy, the star of a Smosh.com parody vid about a newbie Pokémon Go player. 'Interviewed' by a news reporter, the noob reels off all the names he's given his new Pokémon friends.

AND THEY'RE FRIGGIN' AWESOME:

Related: Everyone Has A Pokémon Twin. Who's Yours?