Wes Morgan bought a cucumber from Tesco to make his "favourite dish" - a cucumber sandwich (we like him already).
But soon he found himself complaining to the purveyor of the green goods after finding a DEAD WORM wedged inside the packaging.
Tesco sympathised deeply.
The poor worm had so much more to give! So many holes to wriggle in! So many cucumbers to slide on!
Wes Metcalfe did not stop there, though. No sir.
He held a goddamn funeral. And Tesco reacted as anyone would, really:
The whole saga ended with Wes, a man who almost ingested an actual worm, *praising* the supermarket giant for their customer service. What a day.
What a time to be alive.
He'll never forget this. And neither will we.