17 Burning Questions Left Answered By Friends Writers

WE NEED BRAND NEW INFORMATION.

Think Friends tied up every loose end when it came to THAT series finale back in 2004? What a bunch of boohockey. This stuff still keeps us up at night (particularly number 8. It's NEVER a valid excuse)...

1. What the hell happened to Ben?

We know he got all pretty and shiz IRL, but he straight up disappears from the show without any explanation. WHERE ART THOU BEN?

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2. How much does this potato cost?

Because it looks pretty tasty.

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3. Are Ross and Rachel still together?

Ross is a bastard, and here's the proof. How long will it take for Rachel to finally realise this fact and run off into the arms of her true soul mate, Gunther. And speaking of that guy…

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4. What the hell is his last name?

Central Perk?

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5. Will Joey bring his sister and the rest of his castmates from his solo show?

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6. Or, for that matter, any of the Tribbiani sisters?

7. Did Smelly Cat become a cult classic?

And if so, how long until it replaces the American national anthem?

8. Is "We were on a break" a valid excuse?

They never really settled that one.

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9. Is Chandler ready to bring back his goatee?

10. Why did Monica and Chandler break their promise to name their child Joey?

11. Does Marcel the monkey know how to work Spotify?

12. And how do they feel about his thriving modelling career?

13. Who's gonna get down and dirty this time?

As we pointed out before, the Friends apartment is a godless sex pit of shame, where people swap lovers around like Pokemon cards. So who are going to bunk and bonk in 2016?

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14. Do Phoebe and Mike have kids?

They nearly broke up over Mike's refusal to get married, but then he changed his mind. Has he made a decision on mini Mikes yet?

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15. Do they realise that Joey's agent, Estelle, delivered Ross' baby in the first season?

That's right: we are very woke.

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16. Has Bamboozled become an iPhone app yet? 

And if not, we're jumping on that cash cow immediately.

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17. And lastly: can't they just stay there, on TV, in THAT apartment, forever?

 

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