41. Avada Kedavra (The Killing Curse).
Nope. Nuh-uh. Moving on.
40. Crucio (Torture Curse)
Just mean. Neville can confirm. #toosoon
39. Morsmordre (Conjures the Dark Mark)
If you have any business summoning the Dark Lord, we don’t want to be friends with you.
38. Periculum (Produces a stream of red sparks)
Honestly, one of the most useless spells ever.
37. Imperio (Puts the victim under complete control of the caster)
Nope. No, thank you. Why you gotta be so rude?
36. Vipera Evanesca (Causes a target snake to vanish)
No snakes, please. Like, ever.
35. Serpensortia (Snake summoning spell)
We repeat, we want NOTHING to do with snakes.
34. Immobulus (Freezing charm)
Meh… If we have to be honest. A charm that stops the time would be much more useful.
33. Incarcerous (Conjures thick ropes or thin cords from "thin air”)
32. Engorgio (Enorgement Charm)
Might come in handy in a situation or two, if you know what we mean.
31. Stupefy (The Stunning Spell)
Stop! Hammer time.
30. Alarte Ascendare (Launches an object into the air)
Fly, my little baby, fly.
29. Lacarnum Inflamari (Ignites someone’s cloak)
Sure, why not?
28. Slugulus Eructo (Causes the victim to burp up slugs and slime)
A perfect petty spell.
27. Brackium Emendo (Mends broken bones)
Better be prepared for when that NHS goes private.
26. Everte Statum (Flies your opponent back several feet)
Haters back off.
25. Ascendio (Ascends the caster)
No more more walking up the stairs.
24. Oppugno (Directs an object or individual to attack the victim)
Petty level: a wizard.
23. Cistem Aperio (Blasts open a trunk)
For all your trunk blasting needs, I guess. Can’t hurt to know it, innit.
22. Levicorpus (Causes the victim to be hoisted into the air by their ankle)
Let’s be honest, it’d just be fun to do.
21. Reducto (Blasts solid objects)
Could we use it for sustainable living? We’d save the planet.
20. Petrificus Totalus (Petrifies)
Perfect for people who are just supper annoying and won’t shut up. Like Trump. Yes, let’s use this one on Trump.
19. Finite Incantatem (The General Counter-Spell)
It's always good to know some basic self defence related charms and spells.
18. Aresto Momentum (Slows down the velocity of an object)
For when you’re playing sports, but you’re not too good at this whole “catching the ball” thing.
17. Relashio (Forces an object or person to release its hold on something)
In case you’re a pacifist, but you still want to protect yourself.
16. Lumos (Gives light)
Free electricity FTW.
15. Wingardium Leviosa (Levitates)
Almost as useful as Accio. Almost.
14. Oculus Reparo (Repairs glasses)
As people who wear glasses, we feel like this one is extremely useful. Oh, think of all the money you’ll save!
13. Protego (The Shield Charm)
Useful. We respect that.
12. Obliviate (Memory charm)
If you suffer from second hand and post-factum embarrassment, like us.
11. Rictusempra (Tickling charm)
You never know when you’ll need to tickle someone (to death, probably).
10. Expelliarmus (Disarms your opponent)
It’s always good to have some sort of protection against twats and arseholes.
9. Piertotum Locomotor (Brings inanimate objects to life)
Imagine your fave teddy bear coming to life and being your best bud. Exactly.
8. Legilimens (Reads minds)
Particularly useful during job interviews.
7. Diminuendo (Forces objects to shrink)
So you can shrink your pet pug, put it in your pocket and carry around with you at all times.
6. Expecto Patronum (Produces a patronus)
In case you’re not too keen on dying, right?
5. Ridikulus (Bogart-Banishing Spell)
Because there’s nothing worse than facing your own fears.
4. Alohamora (Unlocks things)
Unlock doors, hidden feelings, your phone when you forget your passcode - the possibilities are endless.
3. Arania Exumai (Blasts spiders)
‘Cuz fuck spiders, tbh.
2. Episkey (Heals relatively minor injuries)
Kiss your GP goodbye. Actually, don’t do that. It would be weird.
1. Accio (The Summoning Charm)
Imagine a life where everything is with a wave of a wand.