TV presenter Richard Osman finally answered the nation's prayers when he began the 'World Cup of Crisps' (#wcocr2016) tournament last week.
The tense competition, which relied on votes from Twitter users, was started in aid of the Child's i Foundation, a charity helping abandoned children.
A noble cause yes, BUT ROLL UP YOUR SLEEVES AND HOLD MY PACKET - PICKLED ONION MONSTER MUNCH CAME FIRST.
@richardosman Monster Munch is not a crisp, it's a corn snack!— David Bird (@DavidBird63) March 28, 2016
With Wotsits in second place.
Third place went to Quavers. Noticing a theme? None of these are technically "crisps", with the fourth place winner - Walkers Cheese and Onion - being the first real crisp in the top spot.
Naturally, the world reacted accordingly.
The semi-finalists in the World Cup of Crisps has proved once again that the human race is doomed. #wcocr2016— David Lewis (@davidclewis) March 28, 2016
I can't believe that Chipsticks didn't make it past round two in #wcocr2016. THEY ARE CLEARLY THE WORLD'S BEST CRISPS— Lex (@lexcanroar) March 27, 2016
Of course, we shouldn't forget what it's all about in our blind, violent rage - you can donate to Child's i here: