This Guy Reckons His 29 Miley Cyrus Tattoos Are Stopping Him Getting A Girlfriend

He can’t stop…

Fandom is a funny thing. Some people are into football, others like a bit of stamp collecting. One guy in our office has a borderline obsession with Paul Blart Mall Cop and the collected works of Kevin James… To each their own, basically.

For Carl McCoid, Miley Cyrus is everything and is, subsequently, tattooed all over his goddamn body.

Now, we know what you’re thinking. No this guy isn’t a weirdo (even if Miley herself branded his tats “ugly” and “creepy”). He’s just a regular dad-of-three from Bridlington, looking for love… Only problem is some people are pretty put off by his *ahem* unique ink collection.

Speaking to the Hull Daily Mail, Carl said: "People can't seem to see past the tattoos and it was having a very negative effect on my life where I felt trapped by them. I've just gone off her."

So, long story short, he’s thinking about having them removed… which is an absolute travesty. How dare you, society, pressure this poor man in to removing what has become his central essence. WHO HAS THE RIGHT TO TELL A MAN NOT TO HAVE 29 TATTOOS OF HIS FAVE TEENY BOPPY PLASTERED ALL OVER HIS BODY!?


Sure, Carl also mentioned something about Miley being a bit too provocative for his tastes nowadays, but come on, ladies, fellas, get this guy a date so he won’t deprive us of his unique ink situation. It is your DUTY.

Related: 100 Of The Worst Tattoos In Human Existence

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