Look, fair warning: There are massive spoilers ahead - so don't come crying to us on Facebook, or Twitter, or outside our building with a baseball bat. We'll just throw stationary at you from the second-floor window until you go away.
But in any case, here is some blank space that'll give you enough time to run away if need be.
So by now you've seen The Force Awakens, and you know that Lena Dunham's boyfriend from the GAP adverts kills Indiana Jones in a climactic battle.
And you'll know that Rey had to watch on helplessly as it happens. It's a bummer.
Later on, she reunites with Princess Leia. Aware that Rey is probably feeling a little shaken up by the whole affair, Leia gives her a big ol' squeeze. It's pretty emotional, and sparked all kinds of fan theories about the identity of Rey's parents.
BUT SHUT UP AND LISTEN, INTERNET: Director J.J. Abrams has revealed that the scene was “probably one of the mistakes [he] made.”
He said: “My thinking at the time was that Chewbacca, despite the pain he was feeling, was focused on trying to save Finn and getting him taken care of. So I tried to have Chewbacca go off with him and focus on Rey, and then have Rey find Leia and Leia find Rey.”
“The idea being that both [Leia and Rey] being strong with the Force and never having met, would know about each other — that Leia would have been told about [Rey] beyond what we saw onscreen and Rey of course would have learned about Leia.”
“Had Chewbacca not been where he was, you probably wouldn’t have thought of it. But because he was right there, passed by Leia, it felt almost like a slight, which was definitely not the intention.”
DAAAAAMN ABRAMS, way to stick the boot into our beloved conspiracy theories. Oh well, at least we know that Chewbacca and Leia are still tight as ever.
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